The 3 Month Curse!!!

I mentioned in a previous blog that I was reading Nicholas Spark’s “The Best of Me”.  Well it was such a great book that I ended up finishing the next day!  If you are a Nicholas Spark’s fan you won’t be disappointed!  I found it to be similar to “The Notebook” but it definitely had some different twists!  If a book makes me cry, which isn’t hard because I cry at everything, then it’s definitely a good read.

                Anyways, there was an excerpt from the novel that really caught my attention!  It felt like it was describing me, or rather my relationship issues, perfectly!  To give you some background information, my friends know I have what I refer to as a “3 Month Curse”.  What I mean is that I start dating someone and things are going great!  We get along really well, I can imagine a future together, we spend a lot of time together, and everything is great!  But then comes the 3 month mark!  All of a sudden I can’t stand the person I’m dating.  For a few weeks I’m constantly annoyed at everything he says or does, I feel suffocated, and I just can’t take it!  I know it seems silly especially considering 3 months is not a long time but considering my longest relationship was only 6 months, it’s pretty long for me!  Anyways, most of my friends think I’m being ridiculous when this curse comes along and they really don’t understand how or why I feel like this.  And honestly, I wasn’t really sure why I felt this way until I read this excerpt.  So here it is… except when referring to my situtation change “marry” to “date” and “years” to “3 months”…

 [Dawson is the main male role and he is talking to his high school sweetheart] 

Dawson’s mouth felt dry.  “Then why did you marry him?”   

“Because I thought it was good enough.  And I hoped I could change.  That over time, maybe I would come to feel the same way about him as I did about you.  But I didn’t, and as the years went on, I think he came to see that, too.  And it hurt him, and I knew it hurt him, but the harder he tried to show me how important I was to him, the more suffocated I felt.  And I resented that.  I resented him.”  She winced at her own words.  “I know that makes me sound like an awful person.”

So as you can see, there was someone else in my life that I really cared about.  We got along really well and could have so much fun together but things obviously didn’t work out (although we are still good friends).  Since then, I try to find the same thing in every other guy and it’s never there!  I would joke with my friends that the person I'm dating just “likes me too much” and I know that sounds awful but sometimes I really felt suffocated.  I’m realizing now that with every new relationship I always want to jump in quickly to be at that comfort zone that I had with the first guy.  I’m also realizing that it doesn’t work that way!  I need to slow down and let that comfort zone come on its own time! To sum it up, my good friend said to me, “Once you’ve had something you like it’s hard to adjust to something different, but you have to understand it takes time to build your feelings.  It doesn’t happen overnight.  It takes a lot of awkwardness.”  And knowing me, that means a LOT of awkwardness! 

So for now, I’m determined to beat this 3 Month Curse!!!

TAG!

So an old high school friend, Anna, had this on her blog, Adventures of a Type-A.  Although I wasn't technically tagged, she said if you haven't done this than do it! And so here it goes!

The Rules

1. You must post the rules.

2. Post eleven fun facts about yourself on the blog post.

3. Answer the questions the tagger set for you in their post, and then create eleven new questions to ask the people you've tagged.

4. Tag eleven people and link them on your post

5. Let them know you've tagged them!

11 Fun Facts About Me!!!

1. I was a 3 sport athlete in high school and continued to play basketball for 3 years in college

2. I was born in Lexington, Kentucky, and although I didn't grow up there I still love visiting (especially when Keenland is running!!)

3. I love dressing up and being a "girly girl" but I'm almost always too lazy to wake up earlier so I can blow dry my hair and put on makeup.  So you'll usually see me in jeans and a t-shirt! (And that's an upgrade... in undergrad it would've been sweatpants!)

4. I graduated from Wingate University with a B.S in Mathematics and I'm now pursuing a M.S. in  Actuarial Science at Columbia University

5. I had never even visited NYC before paying my deposit to attend Columbia.

6. During my senior year at Wingate, my three best friends and I would spend hours playing Bananagrams, Scrabble Apple, Shanghai Rummy, and Rook, while drinking Arbor Mist Blackberry Merlot! (I miss that so much!)

7. I admire my two brothers so much! They are so important to me and I enjoy getting to spend time with them whenever possible!

8. Although I like living in the city, I can't wait to move back down South!  I'm not a hardcore country girl or anything (my friends even call me a "city slicker") but I miss the variety in the South

9. I have Beiber Fever!  I'm not a crazy fan and have no hopes of marrying him or anything, but I did go to his concert a year and a half ago, and it was sooo much fun!

10. I enjoy cooking and baking but I usually don't have the patience or money to buy so many ingredients so I almost always end up with something simple like pasta or box-mix cake!

11. I kind of want a tattoo but I'm too afraid I'll regret it! I'm thinking I might just get one on the inside of my lip, that way no one will even know and it fades after awhile! 

Questions!!

1. If you could go anywhere, all expenses paid, where would it be?

I haven't traveled a whole lot so there are tons of places I'd love to go! But choosing one, it would probably be Greece! After the movie "Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants", I've always wanted to go!

2. What is your favorite thing to do in your free time?

I love spending time with my friends.  It doesn't matter what were doing.  Whether it's going out, playing card games, or just watching a movie! It's a great way to unwind and we always have a great time!

3.Why did you start blogging?

Mainly because I was bored over winter break and wanted something to do!  I'd read a few friends blogs and it seemed like a good way to organize thoughts and just write about whatever I want!  It's been a lot of fun so far!

4. Do you have any siblings?

As you read in my "Fun Facts", I have two brothers: a twin brother, Preston, and a younger brother, Spencer, who just turned 21!  Preston is about to get married in July and works for JP Morgan Chase!  He played baseball at Francis Marion University.  Spencer is a junior at Clemson University where he plays football!  Once Preston and I started college, the three of us have become so close and I love hanging out with them!

5. What's your most embarrassing moment?

I don't really get embarrassed too easily.  If I did, then I would be embarrassed everyday because I'm about the most clumsy girl ever!  I seriously am the type to trip over a crack in the sidewalk, and whoever said you can't fall up the stairs never met me!

6. Chocolate or Vanilla?

When it comes to flavored things like ice cream or cake, I'd have to say overall vanilla... but I'm a girl, so obviously I never complain about chocolate!

7. What's your favorite genre of music?

Easy... Country!

8. Have you been to any concerts? Which was your favorite?

I've been to a few concerts, but my favorite would either be Jason Michael Carroll or Thompson Square!  I saw both of them at Coyote Joe's in Charlotte, and there's just something great about being up close to the stage with a small crowd!

9.  Who is your favorite author?

Definitely Nicholas Sparks!  He's really the only author I consistently read. 

10.  What is one beauty product you can't live without?

Eye-liner.  My eyelashes are fairly blonde and I look so tired without something to color up my eyes.  Although mascara is a close second, eye-line is quick and has a more dramatic change (if that makes sense).

11. Where is your favorite place to shop?

Another easy question... Target!  Lizzy and I would venture to Target at least once a week!  One of the other things I really miss about home!!!  There are a couple Targets in NYC but its about a 45 minute subway ride so I don't get to go nearly as often!

Ok, so I'm supposed to tag 11 people but I don't know 11 people that have a blog! So Abigayle, Vanessa, and Cari Ellen, here you go!  

And There It Goes: The End of Winter Break!

So this is my last night of winter break!! Tomorrow morning at 9 am I will be sitting in a Macroeconomics class… And although I’m glad I will finally have something to do, I’m going to miss all the free time I’ve had in the past few weeks!  Anyways, I thought I would write about some things that I’ve experienced in the past few days!  

                First of all, if you’re looking for a new book to read I have a great recommendation! “Look Again” by Lisa Scottoline is an amazing book!  I actually found it in the library of donated books in the basement of my apartment building.  I was out of books to read so I just randomly browsed and this one seemed interesting.  But it ended up exceeding my expectations! It seems fairly predictable but ended up having a few twists and turns that I never expected! It was an easy read and I definitely recommend it!  Last night I started “The Best of Me” by Nicholas Sparks.  If you know me well, then you know I’m a huge Nicholas Sparks fan and this book has been great so far! I’ll let you know how it turns out!

                After watching part of the Golden Globes last night, I decided I must see “The Descendants” , so I went to see it this morning, (yes, it feels weird to go see a movie in the morning but if you go before noon its only $6 and I’m a broke student in NYC so it’s really my only option).  Anyways, I had no idea what the movie was even about but it starred George Clooney which, let’s face it, is VERY sexy.  I was also interested to see Shailene Woodley because I’ve only seen her act in the ABC Family’s TV show “The Secret Life of the American Teenager”, and although that show had very poor acting and completely ridiculous plots, I was once addicted!  Anyways, back to “The Descendants”, that show was very much deserving of its Golden Globe for Best Picture!  It was a great movie! Although very different from my usual romantic comedy, it had me laughing and I cried about three different times!  Definitely recommended!

                Another highlight of my day was I finally started Pinterest!  Everyone has been obsessing about it so I finally decided to see what the hype was all about!  It seems interesting and I found a new drinking game I’ve decided to try, but so far I don’t know if I’ll really get into it!  If you have Pinterest, give me some recommendations!

            (Imagine playing this in Time Square! Can you say "Bucket List!"? haha)

                Over break I also caught up on all 6 and a half seasons of How I Met Your Mother!  I’m addicted and I wish I would’ve listened to my best friend Lizzy while I lived with her considering she owns all the seasons! O well, thank God for Netflix!  Also, since I’ve gotten my iPhone (which I don’t know how I lived without one for so long), I have now become addicted to the game Temple Run; so addicted to the point that my high score is now above 6 million. That puts me in the top 5% of all players!  I don’t know if I should be proud or feel very, very ashamed!  Once again, I’m excited for classes to start so I’ll have something else to do with my life!!

                Well I guess that’s it for tonight! I’m not looking forward to having a morning class tomorrow, but after this semester I’ll only have one more left!! It’s crazy how fast time goes!  Wish me luck!!!

Mixed Emotions!

I feel like I’m going crazy right now!  I’m mad and I don’t even know if I have the right to be… I’ll spare you the details… but the main point is that I am horrible at trying to express what I’m feeling.  This isn’t uncommon, I know, but it’s so frustrating to deal with sometimes.  There’s always a reason to hold back what needs to be said… whether it’s not wanting to get hurt, or not wanting to hurt someone else.

Everyone goes through these issues, especially when dealing with relationships… (PS... I’m learning more and more that I’m HORRIBLE when it comes to relationships!).  It takes a lot for me to open up and be honest with a person and the process it takes for me to get to that point isn’t a short one.  It usually takes a few days of thinking about what I need to say and then a conversation with a trustworthy friend (or two) to make sure my thoughts are actually logical! And even then, I still end up confusing myself! It’s pathetic, I know!  Eventually however, I get the courage and approach the situation, and always feel better about it in the end! 

So why am I mad?  I know this is weird to read because I haven’t shared the situation, but I guess I need to realize that I’m not the only one that needs other resources to organize their thoughts.  Everybody goes through tough discussions that they really just need time to think about.  I can't expect that once I shared my thoughts that the other person will be able to open up right away.  

This blog has become another way to organize my thoughts.  Just writing this in the past 10 minutes has helped me realized what needs to be said…I’m Sorry. 

And for those of you who are reading this, I’m sorry for rambling!  (But I actually feel much better! J)  Now I get to have another talk about feelings tomorrow... so I've got some more preparing to do! haha I probably sound crazyyy!! Please don't judge me! :)

Starting 2012 Right!!!

Happy New Year!!! I hope the first week of 2012 has treated you well!! For me, the New Year has been amazing!! I just got back from Florida on the 5^th, and I had an incredible time!! Here are a few highlights of our trip!

• Starting 2012 on the beach watching fireworks with my best friend/college roommate Lizzy, and another great friend Halee.

• Spending the first 2 days of 2012 getting tan by the pool!

• Learning to Wobble with Abigayle, Preston, and Vanessa
• Going team iPhone
• Spending time with my entire family, including my Aunt Denise!
• Visiting Dash in South Beach

• Orange Bowl (although the only good thing about that game was the halftime show when we got to see Train perform!)

 

(Spencer is #33!)

• Finally getting Chik Fil A! Thanks to my wonderful brother, Spencer!!!

                Overall I had an amazing 6 days! I was especially excited to spend a lot of time with Preston, Abigayle, and Vanessa!  We roomed together and I got to know Abigayle, my future sister-in-law, and Vanessa, Spencer’s girlfriend, a lot better!!  However, all great vacations eventually come to an end, so now I’m back in NYC in the cold weather (luckily it’s not too cold yet) and getting ready for the new semester!  I still have a week until classes start so I will continue to enjoy all the free time!

                              2012 is going to be a great year!!